Why is acting my passion?

A few days ago, I was asked why I consider acting to be my passion.
A few hours ago I was trying to explain to someone how my head works.
I realized that the anwser to the second one is needed to understand the first. Being me, I decided to try writing out what I couldn't explain.
I figured that I would post the writing since I felt I did a good job explaining it and I wanted my friends to read it. <3 I know I don't say it often but I love you guys, my friends mean the world to me. <3

Imagine the feeling you get when you are on stage; the rush of getting the audience to believe what emotion you are portraying, the twisting your stomach gets when all eyes are on you, your memory going blank, the paranoia of being caught in the act or breaking the fourth wall and the sudden anxiety that causes you too feel like you are going to piss your pants.
To some death is more pleasurable then these feelings, to myself though I live for these feelings. No matter what character I am potraying, the audience sees me as normal. When that curtain goes up, it's normal for me to be acting, we all are.

Now imagine that you are off that stage but you have all these feelings with you as you are still acting. A friend walks over to you and starts to chat, she just broke up with her boyfriend. What are the thoughts going through your head? I'm not thinking 'Aww, i feel so sorry for you!' or 'I knew he was a jerk, I can't believe he would do that to you!', instead of that I'm thinking about what my emotion should be, thinking of what my facial expression should be and what my physical and verbal responce should be. Your friend leaves with a hug, you fooled her...

Normally, I can make it through a day by faking my emotions and not get caught. I can end my day knowing that if I deserved an Emmy for my daily acting challenge. There are some days though where I'm not as good at my acting. The words 'cold hearted', 'bitch' or 'emotinless' are spat in my direction, it's painful to hear these words, I do try. I can easily go through life with out acting, but I know that wouldn't last long.

Today, I heard some news that made me rather upset. All I wanted to do was cry, but I couldn't. I couldn't force the tears to drop. It was an odd feeling though, I didn't feel empty or emotionless. I felt like a small child, a small child who wants to hide from the danger of the world. I didn't understand, wich just made me frusterated and anxious, wich caused the shooting pain through out my leg. I felt so helpess and alone, like no could understand.

That is when my friend asked me again ' Why is acting your passion?'
I guess because I do it every minute of my life, it just feels natural to me.